Is it easy? Not a chance. Only pro golfers make those fluid strokes and perfect shots look deceptively easy. It takes patience, persistence, perseverance and focus to get you to your goal.

Patience
Golf can be the most frustrating of games. The ball teases you by going somewhere close to the hole and then veers off unexpectedly. At the driving range, scores of aspiring golfers hit hundreds of balls each day, hoping to improve their technique and get on target. It’s raining golf balls on the range, and the man in a ball-sweeper machine keeps making rounds to collect them all, often while the golfers are still hitting balls! He collects a bunch of balls, only to have another hundred or so whizzing into the range, only to be collected all over again!

At the range, you can gauge your distance by the boards marking 50 yards, 150, 175, 200 yards, and there are six mounds, some with flags on them, at which the players aim their balls. Often a single player can hit up to 200 balls – The club provides them in baskets of 25 or 50 each. It takes patience to finish hitting all the balls you take, when you don’t see yourself making noticeable progress; when you’re tired and hungry; when your interest wanes.

Persistence
Persistence takes you to the next level – just when you want to give up. However much encouragement his grand-dad gives him, Tarun has to put in the extra effort and persistence on his own, to improve his strike rate.

Perseverance
Perseverance means staying the course -doing what it takes to reach the goal, despite obstacles or setbacks. Coming to practice Sunday after Sunday, when other kids are goofing off or playing computer games, requires determination and perseverance. Rajan’s own commitment to seeing his grandson succeed, brings him to the driving range with Tarun, to coach and encourage him, to mentor him by modelling his own shots, and to get Tarun to keep trying, keep focusing and getting better all the time. Tarun on his part has to make the mental decision not to quit, no matter what it takes.

Don’t Quit
When things go wrong, as they sometimes will,
When the road you’re trudging seems all uphill,
When the funds are low and the debts are high,
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,
When care is pressing you down a bit,
Rest, if you must–but don’t you quit.

Life is queer with its twists and turns,
As every one of us sometimes learns,
And many a failure turns about
When he might have won had he stuck it out;
Don’t give up, though the pace seems slow
You might succeed with another blow.

Often the goal is nearer than
It seems to a faint and faltering man
Often the struggler has given up
When he might have captured the victors cup.
And he learned too late, when the night slipped down,
How close he was to the golden crown.

Success is failure turned inside out
The silver tints of the clouds of doubt
And you never can tell how close you are,
It may be near when it seems afar;
So stick to the fight when you’re hardest hit
Its when things seem worst that you mustn’t quit.
- Anonymous

Rajan has been talking of putting Tarun through a golf coaching course, where he has to commit to learning and practicing golf under a trained coach for a few hours every Saturday and Sunday for at least one year. That’s a long time in the life of an eight-and-a-half-year-old! If Tarun has the grit and determination to stick it out, he has a chance of graduating from the driving range and actually playing golf on the golf course,under the watchful eyes of the coach. He will also get a chance to play with Callaway golf clubs – one of the top brands in golf equipment! He will be well on the road to becoming a real golfer!

Focus
Golf needs complete focus and concentration – the slightest lapse of attention can make the best shot go awry. Rajan keeps telling Tarun to intensely concentrate and keep his “eye on the ball”, all through the downswing movement of the arms, and even after hitting the ball. Once this focus on the ball becomes automatic, he will be on the way to becoming a better golfer.

Pressing on to perfection
Reflecting on golf made me realise that the qualities that make a good golfer are the same that make a person reach new heights in any pursuit, whether it is in music, dance, drama, gymnastics, swimming, art or any sport, academics, business or just about any walk of life.

These are the very same qualities that bring us closer to the perfection that is God, who is the source of all perfection.If we focus and concentrate on God, we draw closer to Him and we hear His voice. We can do this through prayer and meditation, by making God a part of our every thought and action, by committing all that we are and all that we do to Him alone.

As the Apostle Paul says, we all need to press on to the perfection of everlasting life, the perfection that Christ gave His life on earth for all of mankind to experience, by giving Himself as an atonement for our sins.We need to forge ahead towards the goal that He has promised.

Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. Philippians 3:13-14

Through prayer and patience in the midst of life’s inevitable setbacks, betrayals, letdowns and difficulties, through persistence and perseverance, in Him we have the tenacity to endure, to press on the upward way, gaining new heights in the knowledge and love of God…. until one day we walk with Him in Paradise.

God has placed within each of us a deep desire to be more like him everyday. He gives us the strength to attain all we can ever be – in Him.

For as we read in Acts 17:28 “in Him we live and move and have our being”.

- Trixie Asirvatham

“Begin doing what you want to do now. We are not living in eternity. We have only this moment, sparkling like a star in our hand-and melting like a snowflake…”
- Francis Bacon

Whether you want to learn to drive, continue your education where you left off, start working, build a relationship, hone up your foreign language skills, start a company, get into shape – begin where you are with what you have.

Why look back and regret wasted years and opportunities? Plunge in, get going! As Nike says, “Just do it!” Stay persistent – that one step forward takes you one step higher!

All you have this present moment, this precious time which will not come again. Begin now! Begin today with what you have. God will multiply the results of your first small attempts, if your goals are in line with His will for your life.

Just get going!

Challenges are high, Dreams are new
The world out there is waiting for you,
Dare to dream, Dare to try
No goal is too distant, no star is too high
Just get going!

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Sow your seed in the morning,
and at evening let not your hands be idle,
for you do not know which will succeed,
whether this or that,
or whether both will do equally well. Ecclesiastes, 11:1-6

You have a dream. Begin working towards it! Of course you should spend some time in planning and forethought, but there is a time when you need to simply forge ahead. Don’t wait for that “perfect moment” when all conditions are right. That moment may never come! People who accomplish great tasks are the ones who “seize the day.”

“Whoever watches the wind will not plant; whoever looks at the clouds will not reap”, says King Solomon in the book Ecclesiastes 11.4 (New International Version.) Or as the The Living Bible puts it, “If you wait for perfect conditions, you will never get anything done.” Eccles. 11: 4. So begin now!

Once you take the first step towards your goal, you attract a host of other factors to come into play – others who share your thinking want to align with you and invest in your dreams, and together you achieve what you as an individual cannot. Your own enthusiasm motivates and energises others and changes the circumstances around you, making things possible that you never believed possible. You have no idea what you can accomplish – for it is God who works within you and within your situation to bring your dreams to reality.

for it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose. Philippians 2:13

The smallest positive steps add up to big results.

Bill Gates founded a great business empire called Microsoft, which grew from small beginnings in his own garage. Mother Teresa’s outstanding work among the destitute began as a small outreach program to uplift the poverty-stricken people in the slums of Calcutta. Her sincere and loving efforts were recognised and appreciated far and wide, and like a magnet she attracted wealthy donors to her cause, resulting in the worldwide organisation called Missionaries of Charity, that presently ministers to thousands of the world’s poor, sick, orphaned, and dying.

All it needed was one person to begin working towards the dream.

Just do what you do best, and God will do the rest.
Put the power of one to work for you!

One song can spark a moment,
One flower can wake the dream.
One tree can start a forest,
One bird can herald spring.
One smile begins a friendship,
One handclasp lifts a soul.
One star can guide a ship at sea,
One word can frame the goal
One vote can change a nation,
One sunbeam lights a room.
One candle wipes out darkness,
One laugh will conquer gloom.
One step must start each journey.
One word must start each prayer.
One hope will raise our spirits,
One touch can show you care.
One voice can speak with wisdom,
One heart can know what is true,
One life can make a difference
You see, it’s up to you…

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When you’ve lost someone you love,
there are some things you just can’t share with anyone.
Not your best friend.
Not your family.

But there’s one Person you can always confide in.
One who’s always there for you.

You can tell God everything.
All the things that are troubling you.

You can share your innermost feelings.
Your thoughts, fears and frustration.
Your doubts, anger and confusion.

You can even tell Him you don’t understand
why He’s allowed this to happen.

He’s always there for you.
He patiently listens when you call.

God never changes.
He offers you His comforting presence.
His eternal peace and love.

May God keep you in His loving care and see you through this time of loss.

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever. – Psalm 23: 6

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Thank you that now I can call you friend. Your advice is precious and I know you’re always there for me.

Thank you for your love and care all these years.
I love you.

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In good times and bad,
You’ve been my strong shoulder
I really admire you
Now that I’m older-
You’re honest and true
I can count on you
You stand by your word…
You’re the best Dad in the world!

I love you, dearest Dad!
“The LORD your God carried you, as a father carries his son,
all the way you went until you reached this place.” Deuteronomy 1:29-31

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I know I don’t always show what I feel
and from the way I behave
you may not know what I’m thinking deep inside…

but Dad, I want you to know

I THINK YOU”RE ONE IN A MILLION!

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I look up to you.
Happy Father’s Day, dearest Dad!

“The LORD disciplines those he loves,
as a father the son he delights in.” Proverbs 3:12

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Every culture has its own rituals and customs associated with the death of a loved one. While it may not be easy to follow these customs, they give the community a chance to express their condolences and provide support to the bereaved person. Special ceremonies on the third day, ninth day, thirteenth day and fortieth day after the loss mark the passage of time and signal an appropriate time time to start engaging with life again.

How can you grieve in a healthy way?

Cry your tears.
In our modern, unemotional world, we have learned to suppress our tears. But don’t be afraid to express your emotions. Don’t be afraid to cry. Let your children cry their tears too. Share hugs and comfort each other.

Express your fears.
What will I do? How will I cope? Grief can affect your thinking, as you’re not able to see things from the right perspective.

Talking about your fears can help others get a handle on what is bothering you, and can give you fresh insights into the situation. It is understandable that you may want to avoid facing up to such strong emotions. But expressing your grief is important to begin the healing process.

Get help.
Lean on a supportive shoulder. Ask you co-worker to go the extra mile and fill in for you for a few days till you get back on your feet. Enlist the support of your boss. Ask a takeaway service to deliver food for a few days. Let your brother or friend handle the funeral details and intercept phone calls.

Postpone big decisions.
Should you move from your independent house into a smaller apartment? Now may not be the best of times to make a big decision, although economics and practicality may dictate it. If you have to move, get your daughter or friend to help you dispose of personal belongings – or if that is too painful to deal with, just put everything into boxes to be tackled at a later stage. Just handling your loved one’s clothes can bring on fresh waves of grief (however, this too is healing).

You can contact a local charity or an old age home where clothes and furniture would be gratefully welcomed. You may want to move in with a daughter or friend for a few weeks or a month after the loss, so that you don’t need to cope with the daily chores and can get away from the scene of your grief.

Pray.
When you simply can’t talk to anyone, talk to God. Yes, you may want to rant and rave at Him. Why, God, why? Why did this happen to me? What have I done to deserve this? God has the patience to listen, and the compassion to understand the pain of your loss. Talk to Him. When you’re confused and don’t know where to turn, turn to Him. Ask for guidance. Trust Him. He will direct your paths.

Keep a grief journal.
Expressing your thoughts, feelings and fears in writing can have a cathartic effect. A journal is a safe place to retreat into when memories flood your mind, or you have sad, happy, even angry thoughts that you can’t share with anyone but your lost loved one. Your journal is like talking to your loved one in writing. In later months, when you read through your journal, you will wonder at the strong emotions expressed there, for just like a river, life moves on and you would have learnt to deal with your loss in a personal way. This does not mean that you forget your loved one. It means that your grief doesn’t have the raw, rough edge it once had, and you are able to cope with it.

Remember your loved one.
Talk about him. Remember your good times together. Let your friends know that it’s okay to talk about him, share anecdotes of happier times. Funerals and memorials are times when you and your circle of friends and loved ones can express your love and feelings for your lost loved one. Writing a poem or a song about the dead person or sharing a tribute, talking about old times together can all help in the grieving process.

Take action
Taking action can help you heal. Go for a long walk and come back with your mind more at peace. Your mind works upon your problems sub-consciously while the change of scene and pace does you a lot of good. Exercise releases endorphins, “feel-good” chemicals in the blood.

You may want to move in with a daughter or friend for a few weeks or a month after the loss, so that you don’t need to cope with the daily chores and can get away from the scene of your grief.

Don’t give up hope.
Jesus, the Son of God, knew death on the cross. His disciples felt bereft and alone. Yet Jesus returned to them in physical form and later lived within them as the Holy Spirit, their Comforter, Counsellor and guide. His Spirit lives within all believers today. Jesus lives forever with His eternal Father. We have His promise that we will live with Him one day in Paradise. And He gives us love, joy and peace and the hope that we will see our loved ones again in Paradise.

- Trixie Asirvatham